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House of the Dead

Uwe Boll's HOUSE OF THE DEAD, based on a video game, manages to capture the goofy, giddy flavor of the drive-in features and Saturday morning cartoons of the 1970s. The story involves a sextet of attractive, romantically entangled Seattle hipsters who hire a boat manned by a salty sea captain (Jurgen Prochnow) to take them to an island rave. Unfortunately, there is a legend surrounding the island which they do not heed: an evil, immortal Spaniard has been conducting experiments with the undead there for centuries. Countless numbers of shambling zombies are in fact already poised to being a massive attack on the invading ravers. By the time the gang lands, most everyone at the party has already been killed and joined the ranks of the living dead. Fortunately, the captain is also an arms smuggler and soon the dwindling survivors are geared up with heavy artillery, blasting their way through the hordes in high video-game style. Pumping hard core techno rap fusion, swooping MATRX-style camera moves, manic editing, ample gore effects, clips from the actual video game, and a dash of nudity all coalesce to keep things lively. Those who like their horror a little on the cheesy side may just find themselves in zombie-movie nirvana.
Average Customer Rating:
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Rating Snapshot (1 review)
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0 out of 10%of reviewers would recommend this product to a friend.
Customer Reviews for House of the Dead
Review 1 for House of the Dead
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Overall Rating: 
1 out of 10
1 out of 10
Posted on:6/1/08
fuzzy
Zero is what i would give this sad excuse for a movie if i could. Holy smokes, was this movie bad or what? I mean, the absolute worst direction I can remember in a film. We see people running through a forest, quick shots of a zombie's face by a tree, more shots of people running, a shot of a video game, a shadow of someone running and then a shot of another zombie by a tree. What the heck is going on? The last zombie movie I saw that was this bad was "The Dead Hate the Living" which was, surprise, written by the same guy, Dave Parker, who has absolutely no business writing films. Just a terrible, terrible writer. I mean, with great lines like "let's face it, we're dealing with zombies here," you'd think the producers would have caught on. And like Parker's last effort, we get references to other zombie films, which when made by awful filmmakers, only makes the film more stupid. One idiot in the movie makes a reference to the Romero zombie trilogy, which has nothing to do with anything, except that apparently the zombies in this movie have seen the Romero films because the only way to kill them is just like the Romero zombies, a shot to the head. Kind of takes away the mystique of the film when you're making references to movies that your movie follows the rules from. Of course, if George Romero ever saw this film, he'd laugh his butt off at how awful it is. And this stupid quick cuts to video games shots. Hey, I don't play video games so I don't know anything about the game this movie is based on, but you want your movie to play to a wide audience, not the select few who are familiar with the video game. It did nothing but remind the viewer they're watching an awful movie. And sadly, Jurgen Prochnow, what happened to your career? This is the guy who is in one of the greatest war films of all time, Das Boot, now playing dumb roles in dumb movies not even worthy of straight-to-video fare. How sad (although the U-boat line did make me laugh). Now will people stop giving Dave Parker work? The only movies this guy should be involved with are the ones at the video store he's the manager of.
Overall Rating: 
1 out of 10
1 out of 10
2 of 2 found this review helpful.